A Public Goal - Redux
My name is Kris and I am fat.
On April 19th of 2007, I started a series of posts on my own blog detailing my weight-loss progress. My original goal was to lose 55 pounds in a little over six months.
I didn’t get that far, but I did manage to lose 43 pounds in that time period and maintain it. Sure, there have been ups and downs of about 5 pounds, but even though I failed to reach my original goal I am very proud of what I accomplished.
But I’ll say it again. My name is Kris. And I am fat. Still. I’m less fat, and that’s nothing to sneeze at, but that doesn’t change the fact that whenever I sit down in public I want to cover my mid-section with a pillow. It also doesn’t change the fact that I have the breasts of a pubescent girl. And that most of my body has the consistency of jello. Jiggle and wiggle…that’s me.
At the end of last year, my wife and I went to Brazil for a couple of weeks and ever since we got back, I have lost sight of what I want to weigh - I got distracted by the relative ease of just not gaining it all back. I stopped updating my blog on a weekly basis, which I firmly believe was the pillar of my original weight-loss. I’ve become complacent.
Losing weight, as I’m sure we all know, is hard. And, frankly, I just got tired. I got tired of counting calories, I got tired of working out, I got tired of caring. There is an allure of my old life - eat whatever I want, sit around as much as I want - because it was an easy life.
But there’s a downside. After a while, I began to hate myself. I mean really hate myself. And let me tell you, there is no trade-off for that. Self-worth is entirely more important than being able to sit around all day in your underwear sucking whip cream out of a can.
“My secret to getting so fat is a simple one,” I wrote in my first weight-loss post to my blog 1 year and four months ago. “I have hated myself. My crushing lack of self-esteem and debilitating self-deprication has allowed me to abuse myself. Part defense mechanism (if I hate myself, if I make fun of myself, it won’t matter if anyone else does) and part laziness (hey, if I don’t care about myself, I can just sit here on the couch and eat chips), this self-loathing of mine has gone too far.”
So I mentioned to Chris that I want to start losing and posting again, and that perhaps we could make a social aspect out of this Battle of the Bulge.
And so, while I was in Sweden for the last three weeks, he did all the hard work and set up this site. And now I’m back and ready to take full advantage of his effort.
My original goal was laid out like this: “I am 24, 6′1″ and 290 pounds. I would like to be 25, 6′1″ and 235 pounds.”
Well, my birthday is at the end of October, and I still want to make that a reality…albeit slightly belated (I wanted to be 235 before my 25th birthday, but fortunately I wrote it rather elastically). Better late than never, right?
So here we are again.
Current Weight: 248 lbs
Goal Weight: 228 lbs
Total Pounds: 20
Target Date: October 28th
Week Span: 14
Pounds/Week: 1.4