I Can Has Skinny?

So, two weeks in and I have lost NOTHING. *sobs, stuffs imaginary cake in face*

The reason here is threefold:

1. I don’t think I actually started with an accurate weight. I think I may have actually lost about 3 pounds. My weight after the first day was consistently higher than 210, my stated starting point, and I was too discouraged about that fact to just accept it. But my confusion and sadness over the fact led to point number two…

2. I stopped counting. It’s really hard to count, you know. Counting EVERYTHING? *sigh* It makes eating out far less appealing, and is time consuming. But obviously it’s more effective for me than letting it slip.

3. Lots of special events in the past two weeks - four birthdays and the fourth of July - means lots of my most tempting calorie source: booze. Booze, I love you so and it is YOU that makes me fat like this. Worst of all, the more I drink, the more I want to drink! I never get full of you, booze.

I have been reducing my food intake dramatically, really, and yet, I have lost only 3 pounds, and that’s even questionable since my scale went *crack* on that first day so I hopped off of it uncertain exactly where I stood. 0 or 3 pounds lost. In two weeks! That is not what I expect at ALL. It makes me so worried that I’ll never be able to maintain at a lower weight, when I can eat thoughtlessly or so carefully and either way, be 210. I sometimes think that because I’ve always been overweight, to maintain at a lower weight, I’ll have to keep a very, very active lifestyle, like 5 hours a week of high activity. I hope that isn’t true, because that is much harder than just keeping to healthy foods and small portions. We’ll see.

But. I’m back on track and goddammit, I have a goal to meet. Today I had my protein shake from breakfast and I did a 700 calorie workout. I want to do that 5 times this week to guarantee a pound of loss. Dinner tonight is Cioppino, a healthy homemade meal. I’m re-opening the spreadsheet and I’m not giving up.

Posted on July 14th, 2008 under Uncategorized. Tags: 20in2, accountability, ambrosia, calorie counting, peptalk, persistence, spreadsheet. RSS 2.0 feed. Leave a response, or trackback.